John Doe

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Posts by John Doe

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  21

  It's cold tonight.

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  but then again, it is december..

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  John Doe

  Little Johnny
  
  
  It is near the end of the school year. The teacher has turned in her grades. There is really nothing to do. All the kids are restless because there is nothing to do and it is near the end of the day.
  
  The teacher says, "Whoever answers the questions I ask first and correctly can leave early today." Little Johnny says to himself, "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question".
  
  The teacher asked, "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Susie said, "Abraham Lincoln". The teacher said, "That's right Susie. You can go". Johnny was MAD. Susie answered first.
  
  The teacher asked, "Who said, 'I Have a Dream'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, "Martin Luther King". The teacher said, "That's right Mary. You can go". Johnny was even MADDER than before. Mary answered first.
  
  The teacher asked, "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Nancy said, "John Kennedy". The teacher said, "That's right Nancy. You can go". Johnny was BOILING MAD. Nancy answered first.
  
  Then the teacher turned her back, and Johnny said, "I wish these b!tches would keep their mouths shut".
  
  The teacher asked, "WHO SAID THAT?"
  
  Johnny said, "TIGER WOODS! CAN I GO NOW?"
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  21

  It's cold tonight.

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  but then again, it is december..

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  2. 
  3. 
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  John Doe

  But then again, it is December.
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  21

  I made a big arsed pot of chilli

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  and now i have to eat it.

  the idea was to save money, and don't get me wrong, it'd darned good chilli, but damn!

  4 cups of dry beans sure looks like a lot more when you cook them and add 2 pounds of hamburger!

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  John Doe

  Still eating on that pot of chili. Almost gone, thinking about throwing the rest out. I'm averaging a bowl a day.
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  17

  Adam Was Disfellowshipped ...

  by snowbird in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  ... but not shunned.

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  sylvia.

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  John Doe

  You really believe this stuff?
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  Well, I'm going to work. I guess you all don't want to guess. ;-)
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  Julia Ormond is a Brit I think, at least she has that accent.
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  Now, if you're talking about teenie boppers, Katy Perry is not obnoxious in the least.

  
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  Hasn't lady gaga got man bits?

  I suspect it's merely a publicity stunt. I don't believe it for a second.
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  How about Lady GaGa?

  Nope. She's an obnoxious teeny bopper.
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  14

  The women I heart especially

  by John Doe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, sort of.

  i'll let you all guess.

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  John Doe

  And Julia Ormond! She's *(&*%&^ hot!